Lists

I am a list fanatic. If I do not have a list my brain does not work. I'm pretty sure there must be a scientific term for my list obsession but for now you'll just have to take my word for it. My list-making used to get on Paul's nerves and he would say well if you'd stop making all those lists you might actually get something done. I told him my brain is attached to paper and without paper and words (aka lists) my brain won't stay organized, causing me to forget what I'm supposed to be doing every five minutes! If I have nothing written down to point me back in the right direction, forget it. Maybe I'll remember my all-important daily goals, but chances are i won't and will be trying to recall them the entire day. What was I going to do again? I know it was important. What was it? Paul is accepting of my lists now seeing first hand how much they help me and I'm grateful. Now, if only it didn't take me so long to write a list. Making a to-do list is like digging through mountains of laundry to find a Leggo gun. It wouldn't take so much effort if my mind wouldn't keep wandering off in a million directions. Okay, first thing I need to do tomorrow is... oh goodness what was it again... it's uh... number one is... [REACH FOR IT]... oh that's right, first thing is spend time with God. Second thing... oh but where is my Bible...

This scenario could go on for a good hour before my list is done, BUT once it's done, sweet relief. I am done digging and I can go on about my day without worrying I'm forgetting something. Oh but wait... where did I put that list again?

My List of Not-So-Favorite Things

1. Putting fuel in the car

2. Forgetting things

3. Being cold

4. Living 30 minutes away from Wal-mart

5. Going a few days without salad

6. Clutter

7. My handwriting

8. Cleaning up the kitchen for the 13th time at the end of the day

9. When I realize my brilliant organizational idea is just another excuse for not working

10. Eating ice cream as a substitute for TCBY (the country's best yogurt - found nowhere)

My Granny

I called my Granny tonight. It was good to hear her voice. I've been missing her, especially this time of year when she bakes deliciousness and frets over her dressing (stuffing) recipe. I love her. I love her voice, especially her laugh, and even her tears have come to be precious to me. There will come a day when I won't be able to pick up the phone and hear her on the other end and then I'll miss her and I'll regret not letting her know how much she means to me. No. I'm going to call her often and send her gifts and letters. When I'm in Florida I am going to see her and eat her food and wash her dishes and listen to her stories. I have the privilege to see her and hear her and hug and kiss her and I don't want to throw it away for trivial things. She means more to me than I can ever express and I want her to know it.

HeyTell and Joel

At 7:30 this morning Joel asks to send a HeyTell message to Paul who is on his way to work. I agree and Joel grabs the phone. With HeyTell (an iPhone application) as soon as it's opened there is a big orange button with a selected name above it, as soon as you hold down the button whatever is said will automatically send when the button is released. So, as Joel grasps the phone and presses the HeyTell application button I whisper (Izaac was asleep) "Now, when it opens DON'T press the orange button." Joel now gets his I'm-gonna-do-this-my-way look and clenches the phone, waiting to jab the orange button when it appears. I try to pry the phone away and whisper louder "Don't press the button!". Soaring through my mind is the fact that it's 7:30 in the morning and I don't want to be that person who wakes someone up with a pointless message and as I'm struggling to pry the phone away he presses the button when I hiss "Don't PRESS it!". To my dismay, it sends the message and my friend receives a message from me at 7:30 in the morning sounding like a freaky person in a halloween costume: Don't PRESS it! I learned two valuable things this morning. #1 stay in control of the phone when the four year old wants to send a heytell message and #2 if it is in the four year olds possession, don't talk until the phone is safely removed.

It's the Little Things

Here are a few little things that make me smile big:

1. The way Joel talks in his "big boy voice" when he's acting tough

2. The way Elijah and Joel look at Izaac adoringly as if their hearts might burst from loving him

3. Izaac's laugh and the way he yells out "moe! moe!" (more) after every bite he eats

4. The way Paul makes our boys laugh - watching him enjoy them

5. Hearing Elijah talk about his dirt bike

6. Having (hilarious, serious, sweet) conversations with my kids

7. Watching a movie with my best friend in the world, the guy I married

8. Eating at Panera Bread

9. Sunrise and sunset

10. Beautiful days

11. Rain

12. The sounds of fall

13. Putting away the last of the laundry

14. Attempting to paint landscapes

15. Taking care of my baby, especially carrying him around on my hip

16. Watching people get touched by God's presence

17. "Kathy's hugs" (a dear friend of ours is known for her motherly hugs)

18. How Avery (Joel and Elijah's 4 year old friend) sometimes refers to Joel and Elijah as "Joel-Lijah"; "Where's Joel-Lijah?"

19. Thinking of friends and family who love me even when I feel like I don't deserve it

20. My Dad's laugh, his humility and the way he holds his grandsons

21. My Mom's kind and giving heart and her unintended humor

22. The way my brother makes me laugh like no one else can

23. Jodi Anne's (my sister-in-law's) laugh and the way she can make anyone feel special, important and loved

24. Katie's (sis-in-law's) expressive personality, affectionate hugs and how she makes things beautiful with decorations and flowers

25. Pam's (sis-in-law's) tender and caring heart, and how she puts others first and thinks of ways to make them happy

26. The way Anne (my mom-in-law) loves, how she doesn't grumble, complain or gossip but prays and the way she always thinks of others and gives gifts

27. How Garry (dad-in-law) reads to his grandkids, the way he smiles lovingly at them and how he can make anyone feel right at home

28. My nephews and neices beautiful faces and sweet little voices

29. The way Ashley (cousin) has been a friend I've known since before I can remember and how she writes and tells stories

30. The cozy feel of clean sheets

31. Something baking in the oven on a cold day

32. Admiring my babies when they're resting. And holding them close, kissing their velvety hair, touching their little fingers, looking into their eyes to tell them how much they're loved, dancing with them, praying with them

33. Childhood memories

34. Every kid I know or have ever seen - they're all marvelous

35. God

36. The way my house looks when it's clean

37. Throwing away junk

38. Giving away clutter

39. When my hair cooperates

40. When my jeans fit

Ladybug Imposters

The great invasion has begun. How they get in I do not know. Where they come from is a mystery. They stink. They're crawly. They look like wasps during flight. They feel like spiders when they land. They are identical to the sweet ladybug with one exception (that I know of, going by someone's word): they're not red. So now that I know they aren't true ladybugs but some sort of imposing beetle I am completely over them and will stand by willingly to watch them get sucked into the vacuum hose. Thankfully there aren't so many that Paul has had to break out the vacuum yet; last year there were so many of them you could only see patches of our white ceiling, and our house reeked! Hopefully we won't have armies again this year. Such a nuisance. Do real ladybugs stink this bad? I just crunched a few in the window and I'm not loving the odor. On a lower note, last night we had a wind storm so severe it's a miracle our house didn't blow away. Turns out our house was spared, but not our brand-new 15 foot trampoline. Blown from the side of our house, it flew over our car, bounced through our front yard, smashed through the tree line and landed in a heap in the woods. We of course didn't know this until morning. Izaac and I peeked out the window into the morning only to see a very mangled, out of place trampoline in the woods. Quite frankly I said, "O crap". But Paul and Red Buffalo (our tractor, sorry not a real Indian) managed to extract the bouncing wonder and after some banging and bending, the boys were able to jump once again on their favorite of all favorite toys. Ever since Paul brought it home the boys have spent nearly every free moment on it - I can't imagine how we lived without it to tell the truth. The net unfortunately didn't survive the whirlwind, but no biggie, those things cost less than my last grocery bill *cough. Some exciting news, the house is clean. I thought our clean house was lost forever under the "storm" that happened during the packing and unpacking for our week-long trip to Texas. Ministry times were amazing and we met some wonderful people but anyone that's been a part of a week-long conference will know it was no vacation (so we are eager to go to Gran and Grandad's house for Christmas! )Yeah, so homeschool in Texas, no way. N-o way. I tried. But in the end, missing four days of kindergarten seemed insignificant compared to the torture of attempting school in Texas. The boys (all three) did amazing on the drive to and from Texas and during the late late nights and morning sessions. I would like to shout out a gigantic THANK YOU to Grandma, Kathy and Sara for helping with the boys! Wow, I could not have done anything I did without you ladies. Thank you again sooo much. Izaac was a pretty big deal with the ladies in Dallas, they couldn't believe he was walking so well at nine months; it is pretty cute seeing a 2 foot tall baby toddling around. In the last few days his personality and voice have come out - folks, he is now 10 months going on 2 years. Pitching fits, saying words, pointing for what he wants, (demanding what he wants) are all part of his newly found voice. Thankfully he is very easy to redirect and calm and can say (his version of) quite a few words. He is hilarious and he knows it. Elijah is riding his dirt bike like a pro and looks adorable in his little outfit! He says, "I can't do a backflip yet but I'm doin' pretty good". Joel can do a front flip on the trampoline and almost land on his feet - ah, it's precious watching him - and he and Paul set up a deer stand together Sunday afternoon - it was a big hit (no pun intended) for Joel. What have I been doing? Cleaning. Pretty much. No adventures in the woods or fun outings for me. Unless you classify going to wal-mart an adventure. And spending way to much money on... what?... and wondering where the cashier is hiding all those pricey items you did not purchase that would make your total that high. Or thinking, did I leave a few or four or five bags behind? Not my choicest adventure but at least I was able to go alone. On the way home though I had to stop and get gas (for the car, I already had gas) and while I was entering code into the machine I noticed the prices per gallon were lit up under glass that was cracked as though someone had tried pressing the glass to get gasoline instead of the actual LARGE button below, and thought how glad I was I wasn't that technologically deficient, at least I knew how to press a giant button. Thinking such high thoughts of my smartness I pressed the green button and as I was about to squeeze the pump handle I see santa clause (maybe not but he could have passed) flailing his arms, running towards me saying something about diesel. He huffs out that I have the diesel nozzle in my car and shouts "you could have RUINED YER CAR by puttin' that diesel in thare!" Totally embarrassed, I said thank you for POINTING THAT OUT!! So CLEARLY! Because I had NO IDEA diesel would RUIN MY CAR!!! That man saved my car though even if he did hurt my pride so I said thank you a few more times to his face then several more times on the way home in the car that was working because it didn't have diesel fuel in it.

Festive

The pale-orange sky is layered with drifting, blue clouds floating lazily over the colorful tree-scape. I hear walnuts cracking on branches as they fall into cushions of leaves while squirrels spring from tree top to tree top; they aren't chattering this morning and I wonder if they are like me, too busy "surviving" to frolic in the crisp, autumn air. Oh, how wonderful is the scent of distant chimney smoke! It brings to mind happy memories with family and friends. It makes me wish I could throw off every outside responsibility and meet family and friends in a giant house in the mountains somewhere and have a throw-down good time together. The ladies would bake and paint and sew and snuggle babies while the men folk did something manly (whatever that may be) and after the kids were tucked in their beds, we would all come together and play games by the fire, eat cookies and laugh and laugh. We would do nothing all week except be festive, enjoy family and eat.

While Cinderella may have gotten her dream, as far-fetched as it was, I think my chances of getting all my favorite people into one giant house are slim, so for now I am going to have to learn to be festive in the midst of the many responsibilities I have and enjoy this season any chance I get. Don't mind me, I'll just be over here playing in the leaves.